


Isosceles

by rainwrites



Category: EXO (Band), SHINee, f(x)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-05-21
Updated: 2013-11-02
Packaged: 2017-12-21 10:30:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/899261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainwrites/pseuds/rainwrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Taemin/Luna/Suho]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lost, But Not Forgotten

_Hazy._

_Hazy thoughts and mind tricks, memories lost but not entirely forgotten. Fate really does work in strange ways. Before you know it, something brings them all flooding back, and it’s insanely overwhelming, really._

* * *

He had been a bit surprised when he received the invitation, some three days ago. It was from someone he knew, but never really gotten the chance to meet. And he would have just ignored it, too, until he received a call from Victoria. It seemed that she had gotten the invitation as well, and had in fact gone to the exhibit already. Her voice was a mix of loneliness, happiness, and shock as she talked to him, but she didn’t reveal anything else and only hinted that he should go there, too.

He was intrigued, to say the least, so he had decided to come.

And now, sitting in the car while the soft pitter-patter of crystal droplets hit the side of the window, Lee Taemin waited to arrive at his destination. He grabbed his vibrating phone from his pocket and pulled it up to his ear, answering the call from his manager.

“Hey,  _hyung_ , I’m going to an exhibit right now. Didn’t I tell you? Well then, I’ll be at the dorms as soon as this is done.”

A soft sigh escaped his lips as he ended the call. Oh, what he would do just to have a day off for himself, without the manager  _hyungs_  on his tail. Placing his phone back in his pocket, he stared out into the beautiful, glistening wet city of Seoul. As much as the rain soothed him, it made him think of another person, a certain girl he met years ago.

There were so many things that reminded him of her, the rain being one of them. The rain was mesmerizing, as was she; so beautiful and full of life. Everything about her was incredibly fascinating.

He squeezed his eyes shut as a torrent of memories came flooding back, reminding him of his most beautiful of disasters. Most of the time, he tried to vanquish such thoughts from his mind, but today, he let them stay.

How long had it been? How long had it been since he last saw her?

He remembered many memories – how she had promised that she would always stand by him, how she would always be there for him.

Always, always, always.

She had a beautiful soul, full of innocence and undiscovered passion. She was so full of kindness she never got to express, because no one thought she had been worth it. She was though, she was so worth it.

She was brought into his life, and the longer she stayed, the more she crept inside him, the more he noticed how much color lacked in his world. She had brought life into his world, until suddenly, it all changed. It had happened so fast – it wasn't too long ago that they had met, and then she had gone in a blink of an eye.

He sighed wistfully, because he never saw her again.

He hadn’t seen her in years, and he knows it’s stupid of him, but he can’t stop hoping that maybe, just maybe, he could see her again. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, things he wasn’t able to tell her before. But now she’s gone.

Gone, gone, gone.

It was almost as if she were a figment of his imagination, like she couldn’t possibly exist.

He closed his eyes as the burning started. It hurt, in a way. Losing someone very dear to his heart. He swallowed the lump in his throat, berating himself for almost losing control of his emotions. He shook his head, taking a deep breath and trying to dispel the memories from his mind.

So much for remembering.

* * *

Walking out of the car and into the wet, busy streets, Taemin entered the small building before him. As he entered the lobby, he couldn’t help but feel uneasy.

Why was he doing this again?

Truth be told, he wasn’t much of a fan of art exhibits. He didn’t really understand why people paid good money to see random lines or spatters of paints on canvas or odd structures that have been created out of trash. Thankfully though, the one who invited him was a photographer, and the gallery was only showing a photo exhibition instead of art. He wasn’t really in the mood to strike up some conversation with any artistic intellectual about the emotions a spattered painting or an odd structure evoked in him.

The gallery was not large, just a medium-sized room. It had an airy and open set-up, the collections separated by partitions. It was a nice place, very trendy and modern.

As he entered, a couple of heads turned to look at him, a few teenagers recognizing him immediately. He sent them a polite smile and a wave, before setting off to a more secluded section of the gallery. Thankfully, no one had decided to follow him.

He walked around for a bit, avoiding the crowd at all cost, looking through the works the artist had on display. Passing picture after picture with disinterest, he wondered what was so interesting about the exhibit that compelled Victoria to call him and tell him to come.

He walked further until he arrived at a small section of the gallery. It showed a series of silhouettes, and judging from the built, they were of the same subject. He didn’t know much about art, but these he appreciated. They were beautiful and it made his chest tighten the tiniest bit. Why, he didn’t know.

And then he arrived at the last photo and just about every thing froze.

Just moments ago, he still thought he could never see her again.

Until now.

Right there. In that wall. Staring back at him with her hauntingly beautiful eyes.

With her face. With her hair. With her smile.

That smile – it’s unmistakably hers. 

 

_\- end of chapter one -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 21 May 2012 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	2. Did You Know That I Fell In Love With You At The Sight Of Your Smile?

_Her name is Park Sunyoung and she has a wonderful smile._

_Even the first time he saw her, it was the first thing he noticed about her. That, and her aura so sweet. So innocent. So honest._

_Her smile – it was what set her apart from the rest. Rarely did he see that smile disappear. She smiled. Always smiled._

_Taemin is in love with that smile. With Sunyoung._

* * *

That smile – it’s unmistakably hers.

It was the same smile he fell in love with.

There was something different though, he realized, as his eyes lingered over Park Sunyoung’s picture. It was the smile which held the same warmth as before, but now, another aura seemed to glow on her.

A new found happiness. A twinkle making her eyes more brilliant than ever. Oh, she had never looked so radiant before. The photo in the wall had captured her smile, her giggle, her laugh so perfectly – forever frozen in the canvas.

Her photograph was taken as she was busy chasing after a butterfly across a field, her hand stretched out as if trying to touch the sky. She had long flowing brown hair now, and her locks waved in the wind as she ran. He could feel – physically feel – her joy in the wide upturn of her lips; her smile – so fun and carefree, shone with such contentment and glee.

Under the frame are the words: “We find happiness in the smallest of things.”

Indeed.

He looked at her happy face once more, and realized with a pang that Sunyoung had never looked this happy with him.

Because even when she smiled around him a lot (and he was thankful he could make her happy in one way or another), he was also the reason for her tears. Tears made when he told her he couldn’t be with her, when he told her his career is much more important than her.

Oh, what a fool he had been.

He had expected her to hate him, to lash out on him, but instead of doing so, she had supported him. And, oh, he had hated her then. For being so selfless, for being so giving that she would give up her own happiness.

_“Best of luck to you, Taemin,”_ she had said with a smile, before running away from him. He didn’t know it was the last time he was going to see her.

She had gone – without notice, without a goodbye. For someone as thoughtful and caring as her, she didn’t leave anything, not even a clue. No one knew why she left so instantly. Taemin didn’t want to believe it was because of him.

_If only he had a second chance – to start over and make it right..._

He looked at her picture for the last time, backing away from her mesmerizing eyes and her enchanting smile. He sighed and prepared himself to leave, before a soft voice spoke behind him, making him turn away from her photo altogether.

“Lee Taemin?”

He faced the owner of the voice, and he looked to see a petite girl with a very charming façade.

“You are Lee Taemin, right?” he nodded in response, and the girl clapped her hands enthusiastically.

“This is such a surprise! I’m pleased to meet you.” The girl took his hands, shaking them like an old friend would. “I’m Kim Taeyeon, sister of the owner of this exhibit.”

Taeyeon then turned her head towards the photo in front of him, making him focus on the beautiful girl in the picture once more.

“Ahhhh, our Sunyoung is really lovely…” she whispered in awe. Taemin was more than certain the girl in the picture was Sunyoung, but hearing her name from the other girl’s lips just felt… surreal.

_It’s really her._

“You know her?” he couldn’t help but ask, his mind now reeling with the possibility of seeing Sunyoung again.

Will he finally see her again?

“Of course!” she said earnestly, “She’s very beautiful, isn’t she? And she looks so happy in this picture, too..." she trailed off, smiling contentedly, "I believe this was also the time she and my brother got together."

Instantly, he felt his world come crashing down – he had thought he had the world right in his hands, only for it to be snatched out from him again.

“Together?” he whispered as if on a half-daze, but Taeyeon didn’t hear him as she continued to ramble on.

“Joonmyunnie is actually a bit sensitive with this picture,” she continued as Taemin listened, eyes clouded over, “Though he wanted to show every one that his Sunyoung is most beautiful, he was really worried about the viewers, too. It really gave him a lot of trouble when a lot of male customers were asking him for this photograph.”

_His_  Sunyoung. The words pierced his heart like a dagger.

“… And it has been bluntly posted that this is not for sale, too. So Taemin- _ssi_ , you couldn’t ask for this picture either.” Taeyeon chuckled at her joke, completely unaware of the boy’s reaction to every thing she had said. Oblivious to the boy's despair, Taeyeon turned towards him, still as animated as ever.

“But I can introduce her to you if you want.” And before he could answer her, “Oh, there she is… Sunyoung- _ah_! Excuse me for a second, Taemin- _ssi_.”

He made no move as the older one left him, running towards the other girl.

He didn’t dare look. He couldn’t. There he was, standing frozen as he faced her picture on the wall.

“ _Unnie_! I was looking for you!”

That soft voice, that soft chuckle  – getting nearer and nearer and nearer – was making his head spin.

“Sunyoung… I’m telling you, he’s even more gorgeous in person – there he is! Taemin- _ssi_!”

He felt his heart  _stop_. Slowly, he turned his head, only to be frozen once again by that voice.

“Taemin?”

Her voice. Speaking his name.

Time stilled, the world ceased turning, and all else seemed to fade away save for her voice. Her voice, which still sent shivers down his spine.

He couldn’t stop it now. He turned around, facing the inevitable.

The inevitable which only took his breath away.

There she was, the girl he’d been wondering about for years. Standing back in his life, beaming at him. With that sparkling eyes, that dazzling smile he had never forgotten, would never forget.

“Sunyoung,” he breathed, unable to look away.

It was the moment when the details in the canvas became tangible and real.

 

_\- end of chapter two -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 18 June 2012 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	3. Remember Me

_He feels like he’s in the edge between fantasy and reality, because it has seemed so impossible countless of times that he isn’t sure what to believe anymore._

_Sunyoung is standing before him._

_Is this a dream?_

_He thinks it is, but it’s such an impossibly vivid dream, and it feels very real that he thinks if he reaches out he’ll be able to touch her._

_He doesn’t, however, because the dream always disappears when he does that._

* * *

It was the moment when the details in the canvas became tangible and real.

The past thirty seconds had probably been one of the longest moments in his life.

“Lee Taemin?” she said almost breathlessly. Her voice was as he remembered, though now it was more mature, more silken. Sunyoung’s voice had always been comforting to him.

_Sunyoung-ah…_

In that instant, he wanted nothing more than to run up to her and hold her, make sure she was real. She stared at him for a moment and for a second he thought he’d lose her, but then she was striding towards him.

Truly, Sunyoung was beautiful. His memories did her no justice.

“So you two know each other?” Taeyeon appeared next to Sunyoung, placing a hand on the latter’s arm. They both nodded in return.

“I was the one who sent out the invitations,  _unnie_ ,” Sunyoung explained, “along with the others.”

“Oh! So he’s one of your friends whom you haven’t seen yet? What a small world!” She then turned to Taemin, “The others already came here days ago. I’m glad you came!”

Taemin offered the older girl a weak smile, and she beamed at him even more.

And then, without warning, Sunyoung stepped closer to him, surprising him by taking his hand in hers. He felt his breath catch in his throat at the touch.

She was smiling at him. “The others had spoken of you a lot… you are an idol, too, am I right? And also… one of my friends?”

Taemin was confused. Didn’t she know him? Or was she pretending not to know?

In a second, a million thoughts jumped into his head – a million of questions demanding to be answered.

Is this some sort of trick? Payback for what he did to her a couple of years ago?

But… Sunyoung wasn’t like that. She wouldn’t do that to him.

He looked at her and her smile was too sweet. He forced himself to nod, even without understanding anything.

“Don’t you—”

“Oh, there you are!” A masculine voice spoke from a distance, cutting him off, and they both turned to see who it was.

“Joonmyun- _oppa_!”

Sunyoung released his hand in an instant, running towards the other boy. She then pulled him back where she was standing a few moments ago.

“ _Oppa_ , this is Taemin, one of my friends… Taemin, this is Joonmyun- _oppa_.”

“Hello, Taemin- _ssi_. Thank you for coming to my exhibit…”

The other boy held his hand out, smiling at him. His smile reminded him so much of Sunyoung’s, and Taemin didn’t know what to feel anymore.

“Please excuse us,” Joonmyun said politely, “but I’m afraid we have to leave you for a while.” He turned to the girl beside him, “Mother needs your help with something.”

He then took Sunyoung’s hand, which she received all too willingly, Lee Taemin immediately forgotten. They smiled tenderly at each other, and she looked so happy it was devastating to watch for too long.

They turned to leave, but before they could get away, Sunyoung called out.

“Please don’t leave yet,” she told him, “I’ll be back!”

She smiled brightly at him, and he forced a smile back until they walked away finally.

A few moments passed, and he just stood there, frozen. He closed his eyes as the burning started. It was just too much.

His mind reeled, still filled with questions unanswered.

“Taemin- _ssi_?” From a distance, he heard someone call out his name, and he forced himself to open his eyes, to find Taeyeon’s concerned eyes looking at him. “Are you okay?”

He could only nod.

“Oh, she must mean a lot to all of you, huh?” she asked, and without waiting for his answer she continued, “One of her friends, Victoria- _ssi_  – I believe you know her as well – even broke down when she saw her. I don’t really know what happened, but I assume none of you knew where she was until now?”

Another nod.

“But at least she’s here now, right?” she said, “Our Sunyoung must be so happy to see her old friends. She deserved it, really; after all she’s been through. That girl, she’s really strong, even with the operation—”

“Operation?” He whispered hoarsely, somehow dreading what he was about to hear. But he needed answers. He needed to  _know…_

“Oh, you didn’t know? Well, I guess I have to tell you the whole story, too…”

Unknowingly, he held his breath, as he waited for the girl to speak.

“A couple of years ago, Joonmyun and Sunyoung were involved in an accident – nothing too major, no—” she said when she saw his eyes widen, “that was when he first met her. Fortunately, both of them weren’t seriously harmed, at least not physically, but Joonmyun still took her to the hospital to have everything checked. And somehow through the checkup they found out that Sunyoung had some kind of a brain disease.”

_Brain disease?_

All of a sudden, memories of Sunyoung complaining about a persisting headache flashed through his mind. She even fainted at one point, but they had attributed the episode to fatigue and nothing else.           

“I believe it was only a part of her brain that got affected, but they were warned beforehand that if she were to undergo operation she might lose most of her memories – it was really critical…”

He felt his heart constrict. He couldn’t move.

“I heard she got really shocked as well – she didn’t believe any of it at first. It had been really tough for her, but Joonmyun had so much faith in her. He was by her side every day. He even had her write everything she could remember in a journal – I believe that’s where she got all of your names. Then they traveled abroad to have her brain operated, and luckily it was a success.”

He finally let out the breath he was holding. Taeyeon turned to him, offering another smile.

“And she’s been doing really great these days. I’m so proud of her.”

He didn’t say anything, and silence passed between the two for a long time, before the older one excused herself finally. She left him after a while, alone with his thoughts once more.

His eyes flickered to the picture before him. He remembered when she saw him again earlier. Not even a look of recognition, as if she indeed had just seen him for the first time.

Suddenly, it was like that slow-motion part of the movie, where something is painfully revealed, and suddenly the main character is walking really slowly, but the world around them is speeding by really fast.

Pain, denial, loss of hope, and so much more. Those were what Taemin felt right now.

She really didn’t remember him.

 

_\- end of chapter three -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 04 July 2012 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	4. Beginnings and Endings

_There are a lot of things for a girl to love about a guy— his looks, his wit, his sense of humor. Yet sometimes, just sometimes, she can love him for the simple reason that he loves her._

* * *

She really didn’t remember him.

There was something about Lee Taemin though, that intrigued her. Something about the way he looked at her—as if he was looking down into her soul, reading her mind. For some reason, she felt as if there was something more to him, to  _them_ , that she had yet to find out.

She closed her eyes, trying to recall anything,  _anything_  to make her remember about this boy and his soulful eyes, yet there was nothing.  _Nothing._

“Are you okay?” Joonmyun’s voice pierced through her thoughts, and she looked up at him to see his eyes filled with that all-too-familiar concern he had shown her countless of times before.

She nodded, smiling reassuringly, before reaching out to smooth his hair, and she chuckled when he pushed his cheek into the curve of her palm, nuzzling affectionately.

“Oh,  _oppa._ What would I do without you?”

* * *

_Bright, white light— that was all she could see. It shone and sparkled as it surrounded her, giving her a feeling of warmth and solitude. Where did this light come from? It felt right though, as if it was supposed to be there. She felt secured. Contented. Complete._

_Where was she? Was it heaven? She wasn’t sure. Not until the angel appeared._

_His face comes into view, and she feels her breath catch in her throat. He was beautiful, with hair that is midnight black, and pale, pale skin._

_“Who are you? Where am I?”_

_“My name is Kim Joonmyun. And you are in the hospital.”_

_As he handed her a pill, she felt terrified. But when she voiced her concerns, he told her she didn’t need to worry— he wouldn’t let her._

_He took her hand in his, placing the pill in her palm, before closing it in his and giving it a comforting squeeze. He smiled at her—a smile that told her he believed in her._

_“This will make you feel better.”_

* * *

She was grateful, truly grateful, that she met him. Above anything, he gave her hope. Joonmyun was with her from the start, and in every step of the way. Without him, she didn’t think she’d be able to make it.

A small smile appeared on her face as he took her in his arms, making her feel warm and protected. Why, oh why, did he have to be this way?

He’s too kind, too caring, too completely and utterly perfect for a girl like her.

“You’re too good for me,” she told him, voice just barely above a whisper.

“No.  _You_  are too good for me.”

 

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

_There are a lot of things for a guy to love about a girl—her looks, her wit, her sense of humor. Yet sometimes, just sometimes, he can love her for the simple reason that she loves him._

* * *

She really didn’t remember him. Her pain. Her sadness. Her  _love._

He didn’t want to believe it.

He was now sitting by the lounge, heart and mind still reeling from the encounter. He didn’t feel like moving yet, he didn’t think he could after what happened. His heart felt heavy as he stared at the crowd, moving past him like a blur.

He felt his phone vibrate from his pocket, and the message from Jinki— ‘ _Where are you? Manager-hyung is looking for you’—_  flashed at the screen before him. He stood up, and was just about to take his first step away from it all when a voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Lee Taemin!”

And there she was, again. She came to his side, panting a bit from trying to catch up to him. “Joonmyun- _oppa_  just left to talk to some clients. You don’t mind hanging around for a while, do you?”

She sat down at the bench he had just vacated, and he sat beside her. (What are you doing, Lee Taemin?)

“You know, I have met the others before,” she began, a small smile playing on her lips. “To be honest, I really can’t imagine I was one of you… training to be an idol. I mean, with my illness and all. But…” she chuckled then, as she looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, “it must have been very exciting…”

He didn’t say anything. Images of the past flew past his mind like flashbacks from a movie scene— training together till late at night, meeting up secretly in the dorms, sneaking out past curfew to buy snacks. It was exciting, indeed.

“Taemin,” she looked at him once again, “would you care to have dinner with us one of these days? I barely get anything about you from the others, but Victoria- _unnie_  has been talking very fondly of you.”

He wasn’t sure how to respond. The truth began to sink in (she really didn’t remember), and his heart constricted painfully in his chest, and even more so when she pulled his hand into hers.

“I hope you don’t mind… I mean, touching you like this,” she looked at him, as if searching his eyes, “I just feel so out of touch with my memories that human contact makes them more real. I was really very excited when Joonmyun- _oppa_ told me we’re visiting Korea and I could finally meet you all. Let’s have dinner soon, Taemin?”

He felt something tug at his heart. His heart ached, but he allowed himself to speak this time. “I’m really kind of busy these days…” He was lying, of course— they had just finished their promotions after all.

“Oh.” The pain seemed to intensify when he saw her dejected look. “Then I guess… I’ll just see you when I can, won’t I?”

“Yes.”

They stayed quiet for a few beats, neither of them knowing what else to say, when he felt something vibrate from his pocket once again, reminding him of what awaited him back at the dorms. “I will be leaving soon as well…” he said, and he knew there was no mistaking the sadness, the disappointment on her face.

“Alright then.” She smiled a gloomy smile, reminding him of the way she used to smile at him whenever he had let her down back then.

“It was good to finally see you, Taemin.” Sunyoung said for the last time, barely brushing his hand once more, “Till we meet again.”

 

_\- end of chapter four -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 20 November 2012 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	5. Kismet

_There are some things one can’t control in life. Things like time and the weather. Like destiny or the future._

_It’s not like he’s asked for him and her to be at the same place at the same time._

_He didn’t._

_It’s just fate taking its course._

* * *

_‘Till we meet again.’_

He didn’t think it would happen very soon. It had only been a couple of days.

He knew it was her before she actually made her way into the coffee shop Victoria’s family owned. Even when he couldn't make her face out clearly, the bounce in her steps, the cheerfulness in her voice as she hummed a little tune while she entered, were unmistakeably Sunyoung's.

What was he thinking? Coming to Victoria’s café when he very well knew she was one of Sunyoung’s closest friends. Of course he was bound to see her there sooner or later.

“Lee Taemin?”

She spotted him immediately, even before she noticed Victoria behind the counter. Her face radiated with so much pleasant surprise at seeing him, and the smile on her face as she looked at him in recognition (finally) took his breath away.

* * *

The fireflies don’t always come. But when they do they make everything almost magical.

It was not yet dark, but already the sky was alive, sparkling sporadically with the light of the tiny creatures. Miniature yellow-green lights flashed all over Taemin and Sunyoung as they sat side by side, under a tree in the garden at the back of the café.

They sat together, alone, with only the silence and the lights above as their companion. The air around them was a bit chilly, but he didn’t mind, welcoming the cold without complaint.

He didn’t complain, because they were  _together_. Right now, that was all that mattered to him. It almost felt like  _before_ , and Taemin tried to contain himself as the sudden wave of nostalgia washed over him.

“I really didn’t mean to intrude, Taemin,” Sunyoung said after a while, her voice soft and sweet. “You must have wanted to be alone.”

“I don’t really mind,” he said, speaking the truth.

“Well then… thank you. For being here with me. Really, I could never be thankful enough.” A contented smile formed upon her lips, before she turned her gaze forward, taking on a contemplative look.

They were silent for a moment, watching the tiny creatures fly before them, before Sunyoung speaks.

“Do you know why fireflies glow?” she asked. Taemin watched as she reached forward, cupping her hand around one of the creatures.

She was glowing herself, the growing moonlight bathing her and making her look as ethereal as ever. That smile, that glow on her— Taemin drew a breath at the sight— truly, it was getting harder and harder for him to control his urge to take her in his arms and…

… _and_ …

… _kiss her_. With all his hidden longing and desire.

He shook his head mentally, reminding himself of the painful reality. Telling himself that this was not the Sunyoung who loved him anymore. That this Sunyoung had a fiancé who loved her very much. That she had no idea what pain he had caused her before. That her smile was only friendly with him while her more loving ones were reserved only for her Joonmyun.

God, the truth hurt.

“They do it to attract mates...” Her gentle voice shook him out of his thoughts, and Taemin couldn’t be more thankful for the interruption.

“The fireflies use their light to call to each other…”

Suddenly, she giggled softly, and he looked down, watching as she stretched her hand out in front of him. The tiny insect in her hand flew around the space between her fingers, tickling her skin as it lighted up in protest.

“They are like beacons in the dark,” she continued in her gentle voice, “offering what little light they have in some hope that another will see, and come to them so they can find love…”

She was smiling so innocently that Taemin found himself unable to look away. He smiled back, and it might have had quite the effect on her, for her fingers have spread the tiniest bit, leaving a route for the firefly to escape. The tiny creature fluttered her wings and was about to take off when he cupped his hand around hers, covering the small opening.

Her hand against his was soft and warm, and they sent tingles throughout his body.

“I think we should let her go,” she said after a while, “let her find her true love.”

She opened her hand. “Goodbye, little one.”

His fingers were still wrapped around hers, even after the tiny insect had flown away and joined the other lights in the sky. She turned to look at him, a wistful smile on her face.

“Have you found your true love, Taemin?”

Her question had caught him off-guard, and he was so surprised that he had jerked his hand away from hers. His eyes must have looked too intense, as she took on an awestruck look in her eyes.

He couldn’t answer—  _wouldn’t_  answer.

They remained quiet for a long while, before she decided to break it—the silence—along with his heart, “Well, I think I’ve found mine.”

She continued smiling. A smile so full of naiveté. So full of hope.

_Of course you have._

God, it hurt. A lot.

She took his hand once more, patting it gently with both her hands, and his eyes prickled, suddenly and unexpectedly.

They looked at each other’s eyes for the longest time, far longer than what he had wanted. But her eyes were just so filled with awe as they bore deeper into his own, and unconsciously he leaned closer.

Time stilled.

The light surrounded them, like tiny fireworks above their heads.

“I have just noticed this,” she whispered, taking him by suprise when one of her hands come up to cup his cheek, her fingers brushing softly against his skin, “but you have very expressive eyes…”

He tensed, swallowing slowly. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down.

“Taemin, I think I understand now…”

Her other hand tightened on his, and his heart stopped to a beat.

“This connection I feel between the two of us…”

It was getting harder and harder to breathe, let alone to speak.

“The way you seem to  _know_  me quite unlike the others do…”

And all she did was smile, knowing and meaningful.

Taemin bit his lip and looked into her clear brown eyes.

“Sunyoung, I—”

“You are my best friend, aren’t you?”

_\- end of chapter five -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 28 January 2013 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	6. A Fine, Fine Line

_He feels like he’s on the edge of something, swaying dangerously but never really falling. Always trembling at that fine, fine edge._

_It is close. Too close._

_He’s afraid. Afraid of what’s on the other side and afraid of the fall. Will it be a long tumble to the ground? Will it be unending? Will it hurt, leaving him broken and numb?_

* * *

“You are my best friend, aren’t you?”

Every thing was in slow motion, like video playback right before his eyes. A wave of emotion spiked through him, settling deep in his heart like a vast mount of solid stone. The knife was still there, twisted again and again to cause pain. To make sure he felt the pain.

He’s trapped and he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t even think straight. He clenched and unclenched his hands, trying to breathe properly.

From a distance, the moon shone brightly and the sky glowed with the light of the fireflies. Maybe if the situation had been different, he would have found the scenery breathtaking. But right now…

He felt blood rushing from his head, making him slightly dizzy; his heart was hammering in his chest so hard. The debate in his head was so intense that he felt slightly nauseous— to tell her or not.

Taemin chewed on his lip and looked into Sunyoung’s clear brown orbs. They stared back at him with the same confusion that clouded his thoughts. He wanted to look away, but the look in her eyes held him captured.

Silence stretched between the two of them for a long while. And before Taemin could regret it, he had made his choice, swallowing his pain, along with what’s left of his heart.           

* * *

_It was an ordinary day. Exhausted from hours and hours of dance practice and singing lessons, he threw on a pair of sweatpants, covering his head in a beanie before heading out to take a breather._

_He walked around aimlessly for a while, before ending up at the company’s backyard, settling down in a secluded corner while twirling a dandelion between his fingers. He eyed the weed in his hand contemplatively, and somehow he ended up thinking of her._

_She was too nice, too sweet, too thoughtful for her own good. She really doesn’t deserve him. Besides, he was only bound to hurt her._

_Sighing irritably, he let out a puff of breath, driving off the dandelion seeds._

_“Hey, you killed it.”_

_Instantly, he froze, recognizing her voice. As she approached, he felt his heartbeat quicken._

_“Well, no one likes them anyway.”_

_“That’s not true,” she replied softly, taking the stem from him before settling down next to him. “I actually am fond of them myself,” she added as an afterthought._

_“Really?”_

_She nodded. “Many people dislike dandelions because they ruin a yard. But when you really look at it, they’re actually quite beautiful, especially when they bloom. A cheerful yellow, they always appear to be bright and smiling...”_

_She trailed off, the corners of her lips lifting up the tiniest bit, and he smiled inwardly at her fondness for a common garden weed. It’s just so… her._

_She plucked out another fluffy dandelion from the grass. “But when they finally turn gray, they can still pass that happiness to others.”_

_She blew on the flower, spreading the seeds into the air, and he watched as the wind picked up the fluffs in a flurry._

_“Those seeds,” she said softly, “the product of a dying dandelion, will eventually grow into bright, young flowers.”_

_She smiled at him, and he couldn’t help the small grin that formed on his face this time. “You really like them then?”_

_She nodded, still smiling. “It’s too bad they’re kind of misunderstood. It’s a hidden beauty, I think.”_

_“Well, I like them, too,” he whispered, surprising her a little._

_“Really? What changed?” she said, laughing softly at him._

_“I think I see it now,” he said in a low voice, eyes focused intently on her, “You’re right. Not every one may see them for exactly what they are, appreciate their beauty and see what they do…”_

_They aren’t talking about the dandelions anymore, they both realized at the same time. “But I do now,” he whispered, before tilting her face towards his and flicking her nose._

* * *

“Yes. Your best friend.”

He whispered it once. Only once. And it was so soft, so quiet, that he wasn’t sure she even heard him at all.

_…but you’re always more than that to me._

He had always been good at pretending.

_She has Joonmyun now._

“Taemin…”

His eyes break their contact, and all of a sudden, he felt her arms around him and he was encased in her arms.

“I’m glad,” she whispered, “I found you again.”

He forced his eyes shut at the pain and longing he felt at the moment. He tried to smile, but his smile was filled with hurt and sorrow.

_She has Joonmyun now._

They stayed in that position for the longest time, her grip around him tightening more as time passed. Eventually she felt her move as she gently let go, and Taemin immediately missed her warmth. 

“I should be going now,” she whispered, leaning closer before placing her hand gently on his cheek. He couldn’t help but lean into it, savoring the feel of her soft skin and her sweet, sweet scent, if only for a moment.

“But I’ll see you again. Soon.”

She stood up, straightening herself before turning away, and Taemin could only watch as she walked away from him without so much as a backward glance. The cold, bitter wind tugged at him, and he pulled his jacket closer for warmth.

He’s letting her go.  _Again_.

Was this really the right thing to do?

He sat frozen for what felt like eternity, millions of thoughts running through his mind. All of a sudden, he stood up with a realization.

He won't let her go just yet. 

He thought it was for the best, but there was only one thing he wanted right now. To tell her  _everything_.

He wanted to tell her he was sorry. He wanted to tell her she was beautiful. He wanted to tell her he loved her.

He had to tell her everything. Before he could change his mind. 

What are you waiting for? Go for it.

“Sunyoung!” he called out, running after her.

He grabbed her hand, and this time he didn’t let go. She looked back at him, surprise evident on her face, and in a split second Taemin had made his decision.

He breached the small distance between them, taking her into his arms and capturing her lips in his.

 

_\- end of chapter six -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 10 June 2013 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


	7. Kiss the Rain

_  
It’s like the whole world is melting away, becoming surreal before him. All that remains is him and her, and the kiss they share. Soft lips and the sweet taste that follow. It feels wonderful, like nothing he has ever imagined._

_His lips still remember hers._

* * *

He breached the small distance between them, taking her into his arms and capturing her lips in his.

He’d dreamt of this, of finally tasting her again, and hungrily he fell into her warmth. He kissed her with everything he had, trying—desperately trying—to convey all of the complex, wonderful things he felt for her through that singular kiss. A small earthy gasp escaped from her, a startled puff of air, shocked at the intensity, the sudden passion coming from him.

He didn’t hold anything back, because he knew how much this kiss mattered. This was it—the moment their entire relationship, romantic or otherwise, balanced on. It certainly wasn’t the time for holding back. Never before had he laid his feelings out to her like this—so raw and so powerful.

Taemin knew this was so,  _so_  wrong, but Sunyoung… Sunyoung was so amazing Taemin couldn’t stop even if he wanted to. His tongue played across the line of her lips, seeking entrance. But before he could explore her mouth further, she pulled back, a pained wanton sound brushing past her lips as she took a few tentative steps away from him.

He searched her eyes, trying to decipher the meaning in them, see any hint of how he’d definitely messed this up. He tried to find the words, something to say that could make this right.

* * *

_Soft. She was so soft, and fragile, yet the strength of her character was so apparent in the determined set of her jaw._

_“Please stop pushing me away. Stop denying what we have.”_

_She walked towards him, and Taemin could feel his heart stop in his chest as she closed the distance between them. She’d never been this bold, and it was making Taemin afraid… so afraid._

_Sunyoung leaned forward and took his hands in hers, placing them in front of her chest. “My heart, it’s all yours. Take it and do with it what you want.”_

_“Sunyoung, I—”_

_“Tell me you don’t feel anything and I’ll stop.”_

_His mind and his heart were in utter turmoil. Part of him wanted to run, to flee and never see her again. Another part wanted to hold her in his arms and never let go._

_It only took the briefest of moments for him to know which one he wanted._

_Encircling her with his arms, he crushed her soft body firmly against his, feeling the shudders of relief that spread through her body, the hot tears that burned on his skin._

_Like she said, he couldn’t deny it any longer._

_“I’m sorry.”_

_He pulled away, and he swallowed before taking a deep breath, a breath of courage. His hand moved to Sunyoung’s face, his fingers caressing the soft skin, before moving to tilt her chin up as he leaned forward._

_Her arms wrapped around his neck as their lips met, while his snaked around to circle her waist. He could feel her smile against his lips as she let out a small sigh of contentment._

_A few moments passed before they pulled away, and he smiled at her, shakily, before pressing a kiss at the tip of her nose. Hoarsely, he whispered, “thank you.”_

* * *

He kissed her.

It was all happening too fast.

Up until a couple of hours ago, Taemin had only been a friend. Just that, nothing more, and she had been fine with that.

And then he had revealed he was her best friend. It was quite a surprise, but a good one nonetheless, and if anything she was glad to have been reconnected with her closest friend.

But now he had kissed her... and she wasn’t sure what to think about that.

Thousands of questions weighed on her mind. Thousands of questions with no answers. Questions with possible answers, yet hidden where she didn’t know to look.

_What had just happened? What was going to happen now?_

_What was this feeling?_

But there was something in that moment that was different. It was intangible, yet undeniable. She felt it within her— in between the lungs, behind the ribs, making her swell, as if someone’s blowing up a balloon inside her. She felt it when she looked in his eyes after he kissed her— the butterflies that fluttered around her insides, the purring, buzzing feeling in the tips of her fingers when they touched.

Her heart was speaking a language far different from the one inside her head. It was a foreign language she couldn’t understand, and it baffled her, scared her.

Suddenly, he stepped closer once more. Closer still, and his presence was swallowing her whole.

He brushed a strand of hair from her cheek, and her breath hitched at the feel of his fingertips on her skin. He took her hand in his, placing them in his chest, directly above his heart. 

"My heart, it's always been yours..."

It was all happening too fast, and Sunyoung knew she wasn’t supposed to feel this way.

Her eyes prickled, suddenly and unexpectedly, but before she could stop herself, she leaned forward, all sense and reasoning forgotten. The second kiss was different—not as raw and as fierce as before, but so much better. More passionate and tender. The kiss felt… right.

“Sunyoung?”

A startled gasp, followed by the unmistakable sound of something hitting the ground. They both pulled away, and Sunyoung felt the air come out of her lungs.

She turned towards the figure now standing by the backdoor of the cafe. There, eyes wider than she’d ever seen them—hurt, anger, and betrayal flashing across them all at once— was her fiancé, Kim Joonmyun.

 

_\- end of chapter seven -_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- originally written 02 November 2013 under **[crackshipper](http://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/100564)**


End file.
